A deeper look at the ‘Man vs. Bear’ hypothetical
Content warning: This column discusses sexual abuse
Imagine this: Would you rather be alone in the woods with a bear or a man you don’t know? This hypothetical question has ignited a fiery debate across social media platforms for several months. The responses, particularly from women, have stirred up outrage, confusion and overwhelming agreement, making it a hot-button topic that’s hard to ignore.
Though its origins are unknown, the most viral example of the question came from a TikTok video posted by the account Screenshot HQ on April 10, 2024. In the video, a correspondent interviewed eight women with one question: “Would you rather be stuck in the forest with a man or a bear?” Out of these eight interviewees, only one woman chose the man.
But why the bear? Aren’t bears predators? Won’t the bear attack you? Couldn’t a bear kill you if it was provoked or angry enough? Hungry enough? What person in their right mind would choose to be stuck with an animal capable of such destruction?
According to bear attack statistics from BearVault, a company that makes bear canisters for backpacking trips, there have been only 180 fatal human/bear encounters in the United States since 1784. On the other hand, according to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), an American is sexually assaulted every 68 seconds. Breaking that down further and focusing on primarily women and fem-presenting individuals, that is roughly 463,634 victims aged 12 or older every year. In that same umbrella of atrocities, the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime reported that roughly 47,000 women and girls were killed by either close family members or intimate partners in 2020 worldwide.
One throughline of the debate called to the forefront is that there are arguably fates worse than death. The question brought forth an overwhelming amount of women and fem-presenting people, and even a handful of queer men, who shared their reasoning for choosing the bear through vulnerable sentiments about the traumas they experienced by men and masc-presenting people throughout their lives.
In a new trend on TikTok specifically, users pick an audio while text appears on the screen detailing their reasons for choosing the bear. One user, @cece, read a compilation of these texts aloud:
“If I survive the bear attack, I won’t have to see the bear at family reunions,” one stated.
“The worst thing the bear can do is kill me,” another shared. “The bear doesn’t get enjoyment out of it,” one wrote. “No one will say that I liked the bear attack.” One of the most sobering sentiments shared in this compilation read, “The bear sees me as a person.”
I have lived in Colorado for the majority of my life. I was raised in Kremmling, dubbed “The Outdoorsman’s Paradise” due to an economy driven by outdoor activities, with hunting being one of the most popular. I have been close to bears since childhood, behind the safety of closed doors and, harrowingly enough, in-person, mere yards from where I stood at my family’s cabin tucked away in the hills.
On May 8 of this year, I was staying with friends who had a mama bear in their yard, which attacked, killed and ate one of their pet ducks. As I helped pick up parts of the duck that were left behind, I couldn’t help but think about this debate happening online, even as my eyes anxiously darted around the trees and bushes for any signs of the animal.
I have my own deep-seated lived experiences that contribute to my thoughts surrounding the debate. Events and even traumas involving men have had me reflecting on and empathizing with the nuanced life events and shared experience of being a woman shaping an overwhelming amount of people’s choosing the bear in this hypothetical scenario.
The “Man vs. Bear” debate, as dark as it has gotten, is not meant to demonize men, however. This scenario, looked at through a societal lens, could be a great conversation starter to help men reflect on problematic behaviors instilled in them through generations of systemic misogyny. It could even be a jumping off point for dismantling behaviors of toxic masculinity.
I will keep my answer to the question to myself and am happy to share it later when the timing is right.