On the day marking one year since the Hamas terrorist attack on the Nova Music Festival in southern Israel, a reporter, two persons of the Jewish diaspora and one member from Ceasefire Now RFV (Roaring Fork Valley) sat down at the Third Street Center for a conversation.
The Oct. 7, 2023 attack killed more than 1,200 people and resulted in the capture of 250 hostages, many of whom are still being held captive or have lost their lives since. More than 41,500 people in the Palestinian territories, mostly in Gaza, have been killed since the attack.
There is grief on all sides and honoring that has not proven easy.
Erica Lazarus identifies as Jewish and also has Palestinian friends, including a former partner whose family suffered loss of life and had to flee Palestine some years ago. Niki Delson is Jewish and was instrumental in bringing fellow members of the faith together to form the Downvalley Jewish Community; she has family in Israel. Dave Reed is a member of Ceasefire Now RFV, a local group that successfully lobbied the Glenwood Springs City Council to pass a resolution calling for a ceasefire in Gaza.
“What I’ve witnessed and felt within my community and others’ too, is that there is a fear to even talk about this,” said Lazarus. She recalled a rabbi friend querying how they could balance their love for Israel and support for the Palestinian movement — an internal battle reminiscent of the external contention within communities.
Following Glenwood City Council’s resolution, Ceasefire Now RFV presented the like to Carbondale’s Board of Trustees. “There were a lot of emotions around the Ceasefire group coming to the trustees and the rhetoric that was coming out from both sides, which, to me, was just horrible,” said Delson. “People were so angry and hateful without even knowing each other.”
Far from the group’s intention, Reed later recognized how the resolution could be construed by Jewish community members. Ahead of the meeting, Reed reached out to Trustee Colin Laird who advised that he first get in touch with Delson. Reed reached out, but the two were not able to connect before the meeting when the motion was initially proposed. Delson admonished the board not to entertain the resolution because of the division it would inevitably cause here at home. They heeded her warning.
“I think there were probably an equal number of people on both sides that were equally passionate and full of pain and sorrow and I think very sincere,” Delson said of the scene at Town Hall.
Some time later, Delson and Reed met for coffee outside Bonfire. Despite tumultuous emotions surrounding the subject, the two found some common ground. Without abandoning his opinions in regard to the conflict overseas, Reed felt a shift in himself “to diffuse the situation and make peace” starting here at home.
During their conversation at Bonfire, a woman who’d been sitting nearby approached them and, after first apologizing for eavesdropping, said something like, “I just wish that more people could have a conversation like that,” Delson said. The unknown woman’s comment sparked something. “It meant something to her, which, to me, meant that it would mean something to somebody else,” she recalled thinking at the time.
Such an opportunity soon presented itself. Jewish members of the nondenominational Two Rivers Unitarian Universalist (TRUU) church had felt otherized because of pro-Palestinian rhetoric among the congregation. Therefore, TRUU Minister Aaron Brown offered to facilitate a conversation with its members. “I’d never seen somebody facilitate a group that big, with that much feeling, with that much compassion,” said Delson. From the roots of that community conversation grew another — actually, three.
Members of the Downvalley Jewish Community and Ceasefire Now RFV came together for three two-hour listening sessions, and Brown was invited as the facilitator. Each session began with a potluck and breaking bread with one another.
Reed said he’d characterize the fruits of those sessions as stemming not from participants’ opinions but more from their feelings. Delson added that it was an opportunity for people to express themselves from the lens in which they interpreted the conflict. “That was shared really deeply, with incredible respect and understanding,” she noted.
Delson continued, “I don’t think we went into this expecting to change anybody’s mind.” That was not the purpose. Lazarus added, “We were gathering together to understand who these humans were in this space, conflict aside.”
“I went into this process thinking, ‘How can we expect people in the Middle East to talk through this and arrive at some resolution if we can’t talk about it here,” said Reed. “We want to demonstrate the peacemaking that we want to see in the world.”
Everyone was encouraged to use “I” statements, in order to refrain from associating blame. Nonviolent communication was at the heart of the experience, for which Lazarus gave credit to Brown.
In a separate interview, Brown said the credit was mutual. “There was really no need on my part to do any kind of heavy-handed shaping of the dialogue. It emerged really naturally and smoothly,” he shared. “I just got to be the beneficiary of great context and a whole lot of courage from everyone who was there.”
Delson said she changed through this experience, and is able to hold two perceptions side by side. “I used to say, ‘Yes, but …’ if someone would say [something] about Gaza,” she stated. “What changed is I can say, ‘Yes, and …’”
Reed is still a member of Ceasefire Now RFV. While he holds steadfast to those beliefs, as a result of these sessions he is less inclined to assume those of others. “Through this process, I have realized it’s way more complex than that,” he shared. “That, in turn, shapes my actions and words going forward.”
He continued, “I learned the power of listening. There is great relief when you’re carrying a burden — these really conflicted feelings — to just be heard … to know that somebody listened and didn’t judge you. They just heard you. That’s very powerful.”
“Conversations change lives,” Lazarus concluded.
