Rebel Without a Clue at 22, Alive at 75
By Bryan Whiting
Glenwood Springs
Looking back on his own life, Bryan Whiting imparts what it takes to be successful.
Most of us have learned our parents were wiser than we thought. Our parents attempted to reduce our errors of judgement by imparting their wisdom, but we had yet to learn to listen first, talk second.
Knowing what the “hard knocks of life” have taught me, if only I could put my 75-year-old head on my 22-year-old body. At the time, I was proud of being a “rebel.” It took time, but my “rebel without a clue” period didn’t accomplish much. Though, the experience was a step on the road to maturity.
A few things I learned from family, life, experience and error …
First, you have to get off your butt to make a buck. Second, you’re in the wrong career if the number one thing you look forward to is time off. And employers won’t hire you because you need a job; because you graduated. That’s your need, not his. He’s only willing to hire when he has needs to the degree he is willing to part with his hard-earned money to pay someone to do it. Focus on meeting his needs in both your resume and interview.
A resume won’t get you a job, but it can get you an interview. Education, experience, GPA, references get you the interview, but then become irrelevant. Everyone interviewing possesses them. The winner of the interview gets the job. Most bad interviews are “I” oriented. “I graduated, I worked, I have done this, etcetera.” Good interviews are “you” oriented focusing on meeting the needs of the employer. “You need ‘X’ done. My degree enables me to meet that need because ….My experience at ____ will facilitate meeting that need because …. etcetera.
Work ethic is the most important characteristic in obtaining a career and being successful. Sadly, it’s the most scarce. In the interview, convince the boss you possess it.
Do more than your share. Do the job well so others don’t have to fix it. Don’t expect to be paid for something you should have done right the first time. Help without being asked. Share the credit.
More people want a paycheck than want to work.
A title doesn’t make you a leader. Leaders tend to emerge and often are the person who least desires the role.
If you need something done, ask the person who is busy. They’re used to getting things done.
There’s no such thing as too hard for too long. Usain Bolt, the Gold Medal sprinter from Jamaica said, “I trained four years to run for nine seconds.”
Freedom of speech is difficult. You can’t piecemeal it or reserve it only for yourself. It’s an all-or-nothing concept. When someone disagrees with you, attempting to stop them from expressing themselves means you don’t believe in freedom of speech.
Every saint has a past, every sinner a future.
It’s your choice to be a victim or victor. Both take energy but only one leads to and generates a sense of accomplishment.
If you want to stop smoking, drinking, drugs, gambling, overeating or any other addiction, you must replace that activity with something. You can’t just try to stop and leave that space empty.
It’s a teacher’s job to develop talent, not select talent. It doesn’t require talent to select talent. Any $5 achievement test can do that, but developing talent is a skill.
Stress tends to come from not taking action or control. The best stress reliever is hard work and accomplishment. Everyone’s had a great night’s sleep after a hard day of significant work.
It’s hard to face your fears. You can run from fear in the short term, but it’s hard because it’s still there and you’ve chosen to have it control you.
Continually using “f…ing” as an adjective lets people know you have limited literacy and vocabulary. Hitting your thumb with a hammer is different.
You can’t overdress or over manner. Others will notice. It’s a good notice.
When you meet new people, talk less and listen more. People like to talk about themselves and they remember those who listen.
It’s okay to make mistakes. They are the occasional consequence of action. Don’t hide or worry about them. They’re history. Energy spent there is wasted. Get them off your plate: admit, apologize, make right and learn.
Take time to talk to your parents/grandparents about their life. Write it down.
Sometimes the simplest solution to a problem or mistake is saying, “I’m sorry.”
Don’t expect grace from others unless you not only grant grace, but lead with it.
What someone else has is irrelevant.
The secret of managing people is asking, “How Can I Help?”
You don’t teach kids responsibility by talking to them about it or studying it. It’s taught by giving it to them and holding them accountable for both success and failure.
It’s a sign of maturity to know when it’s time to submerge your ego and ask for help.
Never tell a student, an employee, even a child that something they are working on is easy. It creates a lose-lose situation. If they accomplish it, so what, it was easy. It destroys any sense of accomplishment. If they fail, it just magnifies the failure because it was easy. Hard is good. Just provide them with a route to succeed. If they fail, it’s okay because it was hard; keep working.