Consciously or not, most people are at least partially defined by their relationship to a father figure, or lack thereof. Fathers have much to teach us about how to responsibly engage with the world. Sometimes, we’re inadvertently left with emotional wounds to heal.
Kyle Jason Leitzke came upon a trove of sentiments when he poised a “fatherhood” theme at a monthly men’s group hosted at True Nature last year. This inspired him to dedicate a day to the topic with a retreat at 13 Moons Ranch this June 14.
“Whether you’re a father, a father-to-be, dream of becoming a father or have chosen a different path — we are all sons,” the invitation reads. “Every son carries a story about fatherhood and that story shapes how we lead, love and live.”
The day-long convening will blend dialogue with ceremony, intending to celebrate the masculine while also addressing unresolved pain. Participants will be empowered with skills and practices for processing their emotions and communicating effectively with others.
“When I was 7, my older brother, Ryan, died,” Leitzke told The Sopris Sun. “The positives of that were, I saw how sacred life was and wanted to make my life count.” Among the challenges, “That on top of some other tragedies my father had already experienced in his life really broke him to another degree. A part of him died and maybe wasn’t accessible for me in my life growing up.”
Leitzke witnessed his father as “a man who was unhealed in many ways and unfulfilled in many ways, feeling some regret in his life.” Before his father succumbed to cancer and to this day, Leitzke has deliberately mined that relationship for lessons. “I saw the power in my own life with my father of how doing my work around my relationship with him helped me be in better relationship with myself.”
Joining Leitzke, co-facilitator Christopher O’Connell brings a passion for holding ritual and providing sacred space for personal transformation. He has trained in the necessary skills to gather men vulnerably in order to shift patterns and make meaningful choices. O’Connell said his father was once an alcoholic and a “rage-oholic” who came to his own healing via a Christian lineage, and the two now enjoy a good relationship thanks to doing their inner work.
“Kyle is leading the way,” O’Connell remarked. He called the retreat “another step in creating a really powerful men’s community,” helping local fathers, sons and brothers learn to rise above reactionary blame, rage and victimhood to take responsibility for their experience. He acknowledged how traditions around the world initiate boys into men, often with an intense ceremony like a vision quest, to teach emotional and psychological maturity.
He added, “An initiation gives the opportunity to say, ‘Something has happened but I am responsible, so I need to look inside and see how this has triggered me and how I can shift something within me so I can be sturdy, I can be strong — for myself, for my family, for my community.”
Leitzke will incorporate his Fulfillment Code approach — helping participants balance purpose with prosperity and pleasure to cultivate inner peace. An Ayurvedic coach, Leitzke created this framework based on ancient Vedic philosophy.
“All of us want to feel full. I’m the guest chef that comes in and checks what’s the ingredients, what’s missing and how do we put it together in a fulfilling meal for each of us in this season of life,” he mused.
He noted that “the medicine of these mountains is so strong, it’s almost kind of a double-edged sword. When we don’t have it, it’s hard to be without it.” He added, “People come to these beautiful mountains to heal and to enjoy nature and let it be our teacher and our healer. And also part of that process is bringing things up we didn’t always know were there.”
The ultimate goal is to create a safe enough space that men might open up about things they’ve never shared, then feel acceptance and love from fellow men. The day will include somatic work and the elements to journey into a soul-level experience from which to build a more authentically aligned life.
To preserve intimacy, the retreat is limited to 10 participants.
In a nutshell:
What: Healing & Celebrating Fatherhood Retreat
Where: 13 Moons Ranch
When: Saturday, June 14
Why: To empower a more healthy masculinity
Tickets: www.bit.ly/June14retreat